Where We've Been (46 out of 50 States)...Where We Are!

Where We've Been (46 out of 50 States)...Where We Are!
Traveling...Resting...Relaxing...Working...On Our Way Out West Somewhere...Where We Land Nobody Knows...

Sunday, January 02, 2011

Reaching Out Once Again

Each time we are in the Phoenix area, we attempt to contact our daughter and grandson and each time we get the same outcome. We do not have any way to contact them, since they changed their phone number and moved, so we attempt to reach out in the only way we know how and that is through our blog. Each time we even mention either of them, there is always a response, usually too insulting and vulgar to give it our attention. Never really sure if it is our daughter or some other relative that comments but it is always the same. They say some mean and nasty things and then say they forgive me but for me to just get over it and move on and that we will never see our grandson again.

These continuous evil, vindictive comments sound more like my sister, who gets into a drunken rage and says and does some pretty nasty things. I never thought my daughter could be that way, but it has been almost 5 years now since she has allowed us to see our grandson, so maybe she has taken up with the dark side of the family.

If it is my daughter who is commenting, please allow us to see our grandson. We will be in the Phoenix area for tonight and we would love to be able to see and talk with him. Our phone number has not changed, please call us so we can visit with him for just one day. Please do not allow your anger to continue any longer, we are his grandparents and we love him very much and he needs to know that we are not dead as comments have been made that is what he is told. He needs to know that he is loved and thought about all the time and that we, like others in his life have not deserted him. A day does not go by that we do not think about him, we have thousands of post cards we want to share with him, we want to know how he is doing and who he is growing up to be. Please Chrissy, reach deep into your heart and allow us, who were a major part of his first 6 years to reach out to him and spend some time with him. All we ask for is to at least see him this once and then to be able to talk to him by phone, emails and/or letters. You do not have to be a part of our lives if you choose not to be, but please, please do not continue to let him be without us in his life.

I have begged for your forgiveness and will continue to do so until you remember the good times we have had in our lives and allow the not so great moments to disappear. That is what true forgiveness is. I have never been the best mom that you so much deserved but I did the best I could with what I knew. I would change so many things, especially the things I said to make you so angry and to make you walk away from the only mother you ever knew. Dad misses both of you too! Let’s allow 2011 to be the beginning of healing our hearts and allowing a moment in our past to dissolve finally. Let’s bury the hurtfulness and begin once again.

6 comments:

Ali said...

Dear Kimberly & Jerry

I am so sorry about you not being able to see your grandson. I hope and pray that your daughter will allow you this gift. Please know that I will pray for you both and her in this difficult situation.

I know how hard it is to have family issues. My sister has not spoken to me in over 3 years other than the words "hello" and "goodbye" when my sister passed away.

Again, I do hope you get to have a visit with your grandson.

Ali

Wanderin' said...

I am so very sorry what you are experiencing. However, no matter what happened in the past should stay in the past. We all make mistakes. Some mistakes are huge and others not so huge but regret lives in all of us. Shame on your daughter for keeping your grandson from you even more so than the reverse. I never had grandparents but I have seen what a grandparent can be to a child through my own kids and through our grandkids. That bond gives assurance and growth.

I'm joining Ali in praying that your daughter grows up soon and becomes the daughter she should be. You've asked for forgiveness for whatever it was. She needs to move beyond it. After all, what you have done is a very courageous thing. Hopefully, she has enough courage to do the same.

Good luck!

Traveler said...

Dear Kimberly and Jerry,
I am a new reader so not familiar with your story but my heart goes out to you. We all make mistakes as parents and whatever it is you are apologizing for, your daughter needs to let it go. Your grandson needs his grandparents and I pray that you will someday be able to see healing in this relationship. I aplogized many times to my children for the mistakes I made as a mother. One day I realized that in continuing to apologize, I was legitimizing their preceived grievances. Each situation is different of course but there is not a mother alive (including your daughter) who has not made mistakes with her children. There are no do-overs, only get-overs...and I hope your daughter gets over this someday. Best wishes to you.

Carol K said...

Kimberly and Jerry, I am praying that 2011 will be the year that you are able to reunite with your grandson.

Kathy and Robert said...

I came to your post tonight to thank you for the sweet comments you made on my recent post. However, once I read this post, I shifted direction.
My heart is heavy and I am hopeful that your family can move forward toward healing. I'll keep you in my prayers that God will soften all hearts to be open to forgiveness and reuniting.
God's richest blessings in 2011. K

http://seashellsandoveralls.blogspot.com

Wild Blue Yonder said...

I'm a new reader to your blog, and am currently not speaking to my parents at all.
It seems we have a similar story but the roles are reversed.
They do not agree with my decisions, and feel that I am still 12.
My parents sided with my idiot brother over christmas of 2009, and attempted to have social services remove my son from my home. (It didn't work, I am a model mother according to the courts).
My dream of full time RVing is shared by my son (he is 10) and their fear of us being snowbirds (we live in canada) has made them a threat by their attempt to pull my son and I apart.

I have a hard time forgiving my mother when she doesn't feel she was wrong in her actions and I fear our relationship will never be the same.

Don't get me wrong, I love my parents. I just wish they would see that I am in my mid 40's and capable of living my own dream.

I miss them terribly, but the first step is very hard to make.

I believe your daughter would also feel this way and given time, she may soften a little.

Time is a thief, but is necessary in some cases when it comes to hurt and pain.

I know given time, and distance, I will attempt to reconnect with them again and perhaps we can be at least friends again.

My advice is to keep trying to contact her, make every attempt and hope that she will soften someday.
I hope so anyway.
At the end of the day, at least you tried.

Cheers, take care and please travel safe.